Joke: Puns

There was a man who entered a local paper’s pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

‘I was in Countdown and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode. I said, “Are you two an item?” ‘

‘Four fonts walk into a bar the barman says “Oi – get out! We don’t want your type in here” ‘

‘So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says “Your eyes sparkle like diamonds”. I said, “Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck”. ‘

I’m in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite……… one jar.