Do you ever stop and think that right now, right this very second, that there is someone out there looking for you? Someone whom you could like, maybe even love, is wondering where in the world you are. You, just as you are right now, are exactly who he or she would like to get to know. Stop thinking about how you’ve changed or thinned or spread or wrinkled or what you don’t like about yourself. (Everyone has a favourite negative body part or quality than they can spend hours obsessing about). Focus on the positive. Shifting your attention to your best features, both physical and otherwise, will make you more confident and attractive. There must be something you like about yourself! Your eyes? Your easy smile? The sound of your voice? Your quick intellect, or your sense of humour? Sure, you may have some low self-esteem issues, but remember, so does everyone else.
Many people forget that their attractiveness after 50 involves a different kind of glow than when they were young. Mistakenly, they tend to compare themselves to the image of their youth. Once self-judged as such, they are bound to lose. Most of us have a few extra pounds, sagging butts, lined skin, and look better clothed than naked. Both men and women forget that their personal attractiveness is not merely a question of physical characteristics, but a combination of many qualities: their age-appropriate looks, life skills, intelligence, hobbies, experiences, and especially their wisdom gained from these bonus years.
The scars and smiles of your years have brought you new and different qualities you didn’t have when you were young. Perhaps it’s your love of your children or grandchildren, your cooking, business success, golf game, easy laughter, the musical instrument you play, the knowledge you’ve gained from travel, or your different and possibly fuller sense of sensuality than earlier in your life. Change your perception of yourself and get out there and have fun meeting new people! The love you find may be your own.
Article by Dr Dorree Lynn
Dr Dorree Lynn, PhD, a practising psychologist and life coach.