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Life is over?

This topic contains 1 reply, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  MrsQuilter > 7 days ago.

Discussions Advice Life is over?

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  • #1732645
    Member since: March 1, 2017
    Topics: 3
    Replies: 4

    I know.  I’m 61. I’m still a baby compared to some of the crustys around here but…..

    I have rhuematoid arthritis the last 20 years.  When I look at my self and the higher intensities of meds,  (I’m now on 6 injections a month,  one weekly and once fortnightly.  That is,  Mtx and humira injections. )

    my grad kids are in Australia,  financially I can’t do much owing to this desease and it’s effect on my ability to do hours.  Im knackered half the time and if I drove myself hard I get tired which aggravates the ra.

    MY wife has primary Billerie cholangitis, (essentially bile ducts that transport bile through the liver are collapsed and is on high end drugs for pain as well as actigal to keep her bilirubin down) she too has extreme tiredness and does what she can.


    I feel I have nothing left to contribute.  I’ve had my kids.  I’ve raised my second wife’s kids the last 21 years. They’re doing their thing.

    I’m,  and my wife feel as though we’re marking time.  Getting up to battle the bill man,  doing what we can with our lot.

    I’m only going to get worse,  become more disfigured.   I’ve had my right knee done,  im due for an ankle fusion.

    What’s the bloody point?


    I know.  Get out.  Join groups.  Dig the garden. Again,  whats the point? Had kids. Paid,  and still playing bills. Tired of the battle.



    Member since: September 15, 2007
    Topics: 13
    Replies: 56

    Oh dear Woofs, I am so sorry you feel like this. My mother had RA and I know how debilitaitng it can be. It also causes depresseion, which you probably know.

    Have you talked over possibly changing medications with your GP? Your doctor may be able to recommend something which eases the pain but doesn’t make you tired. It may also help to talk over with someone who understands, the extra burden of anxiety you carry for your poor wife.

    I’m 72 and have a whole range of health problems, so believe me I have felt like you at times. But the fact is, we were not born into this life to enjoy a jolly, active old age. That’s what we get if we’re lucky but few of us are – and we all end up the same way!
    Life is for doing just what you have done – having and bringing up children; enjoying day to day and helping others; valuing our friends and doing what we can for our community. You’ve done all that. Good on you.

    At 61 you are still young and no doubt want to be out there (as I do too) living life to the full but if you are to get back a bit of purpose in life, something has to change.

    Speak frankly to your doctor – you’d be amazed by how many people are given, and take, medications which don’t suit them but don’t think to question it. If you’ve seen a Rheumatologist, ask for another referral and talk to them about ways you can manage your pain and meds.

    Life isn’t over, refuse to allow it to be other, get out there and fight for yourself


    😀 🙂

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