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Mental Health

"Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Bob asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?"

"Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track."

"What sort of question?"

"Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?'"

Bob thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."

Published 17th Nov 2011

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by Broughty Ferry 21st November 2011 RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE 1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant, have a Little beverage, good food and companionship She goes on Tuesdays; I go on Fridays. 2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California , and mine is in Texas . 3. I take my wife everywhere.... but she keeps finding her way back. 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen. 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets, and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair. 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, "In the lake." 8.. She got a mud pack, and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off. 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late For the garbage?" The driver said, "No, jump in!" 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce. 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her. 13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?" and I said, "Dust!" Can't you just hear him say all of these? I love it. Those were the good old days when humor didn't have to start with a four letter word. It was just clean and simple fun. And he always ended his programs with the words, "God Bless."
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