Average Rating: 5
- Connect
- Living
Inside Living
Featured Living Article
Lyn Potter - Holiday Baking with the Grandkids
"Treats from Little and Friday" a recipe book in which Kim Evans shares all her delicious baking secrets is out just in time for the school holidays. Read more...
- Travel
- Health
Inside Health
Featured Health Article
Ron Tustin - Rethinking Retirement
"I never stopped doing anything when I retired; I stopped getting paid for it." - Bill Chavanne Read more...
- Money
- Retirement Living
- News
- Games
- Directories & Classifieds
- Offers
- Contact & Help
- Notices
-
WIN a Globus California Classics Tour for Two!
This year you could be taking a $9400 trip for two to California
Soothe Worry & Tension
...while enhancing your libido (men and women)
Sports & Travel Survey
Complete the survey and be in to win a $100 Westfield voucher
Let's Chat Over Lunch
Have a Free Lunch with Metlifecare
Feel All-Bran New
New Ways to Get Fibre Into Your Day
Win a return journey across Cook Strait
See more of New Zealand with Bluebridge
See the Difference
Eyesight Advice from Visique Optometrists
2degrees Offer
Making the CDMA switchover easy
Optometry & Eyewear Survey
We'd like to find out a little more about your optometry & eyewear preferences
CDMA Phone Network close down 31 July
Move now & get $79 credit with every Prepaid mobile
List your Classified
House Sitters, Employment, For Sale, Property & Personals
Live Chat
With fellow GrownUps in our multi-room chatCompare & Purchase Insurance products
Disclaimer: Grown Ups is not an Insurance Broker. We provide product information from recognised Insurance companies. We are not making recommendations and we accept no responsibility for decisions made as a result of using the information provided.'
R50 Sexual Health
Check out the new section available to everyone.
Recipes
Find some delicious recipes by clicking here.
Guide to Retirement Living
Get your own copy for free, here.
Join around 100,000 monthly visitors and 72,000 members: daily games, discussions, contribute articles, make new friendships, GrownUps-only offers & more...
Regular Columnists on GrownUps
Category sponsor
The avid golfer
Michael was an extremely avid golfer with a cynical attitude and arrogance, that when he passed away, few people shed a tear. Michael approached the Pearly Gates where St. Peter was waiting for him. Rather than pass through the gates as normal people had done, Michael stopped to ask a question.
“Before I agree to come in, I want to know exactly what kind of golf course you have here” he said to St. Peter.“That shouldn’t matter to you.” said St. Peter.
“But it does. And then in his arrogant manner exclaimed “Well if I can’t see it, then I’m not coming in!”
“Very well Michael. As you wish…look through the gates.” He looked and saw the poorest, most rundown, excuse for a golf course that it made him sick to his stomach.
“Forget it. There is no way in Hell I’m going to spend eternity playing on that course!”
Just then, Michael heard the Devil calling him over the gate. “Come over here and see what I have to offer.” Michael peers through the gate and he is elated! There is the most absolutely fabulous golf course he has ever seen! He turns to the Devil and says “I want to play THAT course!”
“Ok. Step on through and it’s yours forever.”
St. Peter pleaded with Michael as he headed off with the Devil and the gates closed behind him. Michael walked up to the first tee and said “I can’t wait to play! Where are my clubs and ball? The Devil roared with laughter. “Oh, there aren’t any.”
Advertisement
Advertisement
- Article Information
- Explore This Topic
-
This article is part of the Entertainment topic. Click here to read articles, join discussions and more on this topic. Below are the latest articles in this topic.
- Discuss This
-
Click here to start a discussion on this or Click here to read other discussions.
- Cinema prices for seniors
Latest comment at 10:21 30 Mar 2011 by Kari - Let Them Eat Cake
Latest comment at 07:28 02 Feb 2010 by Lilli - Auckland district entertainment
Latest comment at 17:11 14 Oct 2010 by proudaspunch - one for the grandkids
Latest comment at 15:44 08 Aug 2009 by Red H - Who won Celebrity Masterchef??
Latest comment at 17:44 03 Aug 2009 by momma - Brilliant Moving Art with Sand
Latest comment at 21:46 23 Apr 2009 by rowal5555 - Birthday Hits
Latest comment at 12:37 18 Jan 2009 by One eyed Kiwi - The fascination of Yoville-my virtual world
Latest comment at 01:25 18 Nov 2010 by Going-Grey - Great rock n roll band
Latest comment at 20:30 05 Dec 2008 by drummer47 - Berkeley Cinemas - Great special Prices!
Latest comment at 10:41 01 Oct 2008 by Saboo - King com.
Latest comment at 02:20 09 Sep 2008 by Mona - ladies night,drinks special
Latest comment at 20:22 27 Apr 2008 by dispensary_bar - Spizzwinks(?) Downunder Show
Latest comment at 22:07 22 Mar 2008 by veronicaroyal - Nine Days to Christmas
Latest comment at 12:05 31 Jan 2008 by Nana Gaye - talkback radio hosts
Latest comment at 09:45 31 Jan 2011 by juls57 - Operatunity
Latest comment at 19:08 31 Dec 2007 by Liz - TV Programs
Latest comment at 17:44 07 Aug 2007 by Joybel - A STAR IS BORN
Latest comment at 21:40 26 May 2008 by Kai - KARAOKE
Latest comment at 15:10 19 Dec 2007 by Royboy - KARAOKE
Latest comment at 14:05 19 May 2008 by Royboy
- Cinema prices for seniors
- Contribute
-
Click here to create an article on this topic, or view contributions made by your fellow GrownUps members
All contributions are entered into our regular prize draws!Below are a selection of User Contributed Article related to Humour.
by grah025 6th June 2011
A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit the ball into a clump of trees.
He found it and saw an opening between two trees he thought he could hit through.
Taking his 3 wood he took a mighty swing.
The ball hit a tree, bounced back hitting him on the forehead and killing him.
As he approached the gates of Heaven, St Peter asked, " Are you a good golfer?"
The man replied: "Got here in two. didn't I?"
By becoming a GrownUps member and part of the Community, you gain access to:
- Enter Competitions
- Go into regular prize draws
- Play daily games
- Join Discussion Groups
- Find like-minded individuals and create lasting friendships
- Receive special GrownUps offers and
- Add you own articles of interest, recipes, pictures for fellow members to read and view.
site links
Learn how to take care of your mental health
Avalon Waterways European River cruising - 2013 Earlybird savings out now!
Get yourself super healthy and energised fast, live healthy - be healthy with Bev Bentley from Herbalife
Drive Europe from only $46 per day with Renault Eurodrive - click here to find out more.
Cycling New Zealand with the Geriatrix Cycle Touring Group.
Find out what the latest trends are in curtains for your home with the experts.
For endless views of endless plains, the best way to see Queensland's outback is by train. Now with exclusive GrownUps bonus 20% discount in First Class on Spirit of The Outback.
Wanting to remain independent and at home? Check out the range of home help services Geneva Care can provide to assist with this.
