Agewell: Live in the Moment

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Article by Mike Milstein.

Robert Leslie grew up in Ontario, Canada, but he has lived for half of his adult life elsewhere, including Australia, England, Fiji and New Zealand. He also travels widely, most recently roaming across South America for a few months.

At 70 years of age Robert is very clear about what is important for him to live a full and positive life.  “It’s partly a physical thing. You need to keep moving.  Move or you die. I don’t know when I got this idea, probably in my 20s or 30s. Keep moving, keep switching.  I’ve done that a lot too, I believe in taking risks.

“Risk is part of the whole game plan. I learned it well. My father was a gambler and a good one. I learned how to take risks that are in your favor, not foolish ones. There’s a difference between risk and hope. I play a lot on the financial market. You collect information and use your intuition Appropriate risk is rewarded, hope is punished.  Buying a lottery ticket is just hope, kind of ridiculous. We take risks through life. We change jobs, we change partners, and we change locations. Some people do risk taking well and other people do it badly. To do it well means knowing yourself well. Then you can learn to take better risks which can be rewarding.  I’ve changed my life several times, metamorphasizing like a butterfly.”

Robert is very conscious about the need to stay mentally and physically well, in part because of seeing members of his family cope with Alzheimer’s disease. Travel is one way that he stays sharp physically and mentally. It is good physical exercise and “it calls for making many daily decisions.”  He also learns languages. “I’ve studied Spanish, Italian and Fijian in the last year. I’ve studied languages all my life, It’s is more of a challenge now, a good mental exercise.  It’s like doing crossword puzzles.” In addition he has been a “practitioner of yoga for 35 years. Breath and body movement keep me energized.and centered”

Robert says he hasn’t thought much about his older years   “I don’t have plans. Like Henry Fonda in ON Golden Pond, I wonder how it got here so fast. I don’t even have health insurance. When I’m living in Fiji health facilities are at least 10 hours away. Some people think this is foolish, but no, I don’t plan ahead very much”.

“Ageing is living consciously. You need to quiet down and look back at your own life, the things you love and hate, your boundaries, the likes and dislikes, the quirky persona you’ve built up, your perceptions, your conditioning, endless comparisons you make and so on. Ageing consciously is the same as living consciously. Try to watch your mind in action. Consciousness is an eternal and universal thing. It’s about being still and living each moment. From this vantage point we can see our real selves.  It’s quite liberating.”

Robert realizes that having financial security might make this philosophy a bit easier. “It’s easy to have a Buddhist smile on your face when you have money in the bank. But I do believe anybody can do it. Spiritual or non-spiritual people, wealthy or poor, anyone can observe 5 minutes of mental silence daily to experience the space  between thoughts,. There are lots of practices that can quiet your mind .There are also books aplenty and good teachers in Nelson.

Robert’s advice for those who hope to age well is to remember that “it’s natural to slow down. Stop thinking so much about yourself. Isn’t it obvious? Look at people who are not happy. See how consumed they are about their own thoughts. Happy people are thinking about other people. The Dali Lama, in his book, The Essence of Happiness, says you need to think more about other people in order to be happy. We need to be less self-aware to be more fully conscious, especially as we age.”

Note: This article appeared in The Leader, Nelson, NZ on August 24, 2008. It was written on behalf of the Conscious Ageing Network (CAN), which is sponsored by Age Concern, Nelson. If you want to share your thoughts with CAN, send an email to agewell@xtra.co.nz.




 

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