Are Alzheimer’s Disease Caregivers Forgotten?

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Dr. Allison Lamont, Brain and Memory Foundation.

It is not unusual for Alzheimer's (or any other type of dementia) caregivers to tell me that as time goes on, friends and family fade away. Yes, they are often told how wonderful they are for taking care of their loved one, but this is not enough to sustain them in the tough times – and there are many tough times.

I do understand that it is hard to stay around. Alzheimer's can be disconcerting, hard to accept, difficult to understand, and deeply saddening to watch as it progresses. So often others pop in, give a cheery smile to the Alzheimer's sufferer, praise the caregiver – and then go on with their lives. This is helpful, of course. It really is, but I urge you to give more thought and help to the constant caregivers.

Calling and letting the caregiver 'vent' is helpful – hearing, really hearing. Caregivers need help – a few hours here and there to 'get away from it all' is an important step in the well-being of caregivers. And they will seldom ask for it!

Why am I so concerned? Because 40% of Alzheimer's caregivers have depression at some time during the time they are taking care of their loved one. This makes their task even more difficult and demanding. Caregivers choose to love and take care of their family member or friend with Alzheimer's or one of the other dementias – they need to be loved and cared for to sustain them on that journey.

A Few Suggestions:

• If you know an Alzheimer's caregiver, find a way to organise people around them – family and friends – and become involved. Someone has to take the initiative, and if you are reading this now, take charge! Nothing works better than a team of caregiver helpers.

• The Alzheimer's caregiver needs time out – every few days, if possible. Even if it is just to the hairdresser, or shopping at leisure.

• Invite the caregiver and their Alzheimer's loved one for lunch. Caregivers tell me that one of their biggest difficulties is no longer being able to socialise. Caregivers and patients need to talk and interact with others – don't be afraid of it.

• Offer mental stimulation to the caregiver. The dementia world is small – bring some refreshing conversation about the world 'out there'.

• Along with the 'team' organise cover so the caregiver can get some sleep when required. Many sufferers of Alzheimer's get up in the middle of the night – and need care at this time. Sleep deprivation can lead to depression, and going night after night without sleeping well is a danger sign.

• If you know an Alzheimer's caregiver, ask them when they last went to a movie, or the garden centre. It may be a long, long time ago. Teamwork can help so much – often it needs one to sit with the patient, and one to take care of the caregiver. Try to arrange a 'getting away from it all' experience for him/her.

• Ask the caregiver what they need. A direct question. Avoid "let me know if you need anything" – more than likely, they won't.

All this said, I have met some wonderful 'teams' supporting dementia caregivers. It makes such a difference and it would be my 'fairy godmother' wish for all caregivers to have such generous support.

Do you have suggestions to offer? Are you a caregiver who can help the rest of us understand what YOU need? Please email me at dr.lamont@memoryclinic.co.nz

Biography:
Dr. Allison Lamont is founder and clinician at the Auckland Memory Clinic and specialises in memory testing, the prevention and treatment of memory loss. She works with clients to develop brain and memory resilience. She has authored and co-authored (with her sister, Gillian Eadie) several books and papers relating to brain and memory improvement for continued well-being and independence.

For further reading, visit the GrownUps Store , and order your copy of Seven Second Memory: Memory techniques that will change our life.

By Allison Lamont