The world wide web is an amazing place and a necessary in all of our lives but there is also a dark side which we need to protect ourselves and children in our lives from.
For years I have been recommending that parents put some type of internet filtering software on their computers and devices to protect their children from nasty stuff on the internet. It makes sense, doesn’t it? If they cannot view the rotten stuff, it cannot do them any harm. It makes perfect sense – but software isn’t always airtight and we can’t expect filters to parent for us.
Some research done by Oxford University was recently published in the Journal of Paediatrics1, based on over a thousand interviews with 12 to 15-year-olds. In the preceding year, one in six said they had experienced something really frightening online2 – something scary, sexual or threatening, or someone they didn’t know trying to contact them. Even with filters in place, many kids still came across scary and upsetting content.
What can we take from this? I still think filtering is a very good idea, but the real thing to take away is – do not rely solely on software and gadgets to do your job for you. I think the big thing that keeps kids from being negatively impacted online is a close relationship with their parents, for three reasons. First up, in a good close relationship you can monitor what they are doing and negotiate good rules. Secondly, if they do get a fright, you can give the support and debriefing that will help them be resilient and get over it, and thirdly, out of a close relationship comes the learning of values and standards, giving kids internal filters and firewalls that will be better than any filter package you can buy.
By John Cowan,
Improving and equipping families to thrive.
Aaron Sinclair - 6 years ago
Hi John.
Please excuse the rant that’s about to begin…
It’s extremely concerning to me that there’s a growing movement of organisations that are downplaying the need for filtering and censorship of Internet access for children.
If we use the analogy of a pool fence to protect toddlers from drowning then Netsafe NZ would tell you that you shouldn’t put a fence up because it has the potential of absolving the parent’s responsibility.
Your article doesn’t go as far as Netsafe does in downplaying the need for filtering, but it’s worrying that you are starting down the same path as other organisations…
It’s illegal to supply pornographic content to minors in our country, but as parents we’re happy to provide the medium of access to the largest porn database in the world. It’s about time we took this more seriously…