How to maintain a healthy level of insanity in retirement:
- At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on, point a hair dryer at passing cars, and watch them slow down!
- On all your cheque stubs, write, ‘For Marijuana’!
- Skip down the street rather than walk, and see how many looks you get.
- With a straight face, order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat.
- Sing along at the Opera.
- When the money comes out of the ATM, scream ‘I Won! I Won!’
- When leaving the zoo, start running towards the car park, yelling, ‘run for your lives! they’re loose!’
- Tell your children over dinner, ‘Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go…..’
- Pick up a box of condoms at the pharmacy, go to the counter and ask where the fitting room is.
- Go to a large department store’s fitting room, drop your drawers to your ankles and yell out, “There’s no paper in here!”
SMILE… It’s called ‘therapy’!