- #1732442solsticeMemberMember since: December 18, 2008
Replies: 6solstice September 18, 2019 at 9:06 am
Our son has been estranged from ex partner for several years. We send gifts to our grand daughter but receive no feedback. As she grows we want to know her likes and interests. We have the opportunity to go down where they live next month. I have sent several emails to both private and work addresses about asking for a small visit but no response. We don’t have a phone contact. Any suggestions on what further action we could take would be appreciated.#1735526MrsQuilterMemberMember since: September 15, 2007
Replies: 56MrsQuilter October 22, 2019 at 8:46 am
I wonder if you know why you are estranged? There are many reasons for this phenomenon, not all of them to do with the person who suffers the estrangement.
If you do, if there’s been, for instance, a family row between your son and ex-partner, which is what you hint at, then that’s the first thing to try and put right.
You are clearly still friendly with your ex as you say you are going down the line to where your son lives.
Sadly, there is very little you can do until your son decides to change things. Don’t intrude on his life as that will only antagonise him more.
Recently I was talking to an estranged G-parent who went to the g-child’s school to give a birthday gift and it resulted in an almighty row and the police being called. It made things much worse but I understand the heart-ache.
Of course you would love to be in touch but if you have tried to heal this estrangement and it has not worked, the only thing you can do is continue to buy wee gifts, write letters (even if you don’t post them) for important times such as birthdays and Christmas – and hope that one day you can give them to your grand-daughter so she will know she was never forgotten or ignored.#1735530solsticeMemberMember since: December 18, 2008
Replies: 6solstice October 22, 2019 at 9:28 am
Thanks for your reply. Our son lives alone, it’s his ex that wouldn’t let us visit. However, we have finally been in touch and she is finally willing for us to meet with our granddaughter so all good! Their breakup was antagonistic and they had many family court ‘battles’ over visiting. She tarred us with the same brush. The girl is nearly 16 so I think her mother realises that she could/would initiate contact if she hadn’t allowed this meeting.
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