Ron Tustin - Values and Goals

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For people itchy to make things better

“He who sees the calamity of other people finds his own calamity light”

It would be almost impossible living here in Christchurch in Aotearoa not to write about and reflect on the recent earthquake in Canterbury. It is probably the single greatest natural disaster that we will ever experience and for most of us it will change us forever.

Travelling around the inner city of Christchurch after the quake the amount of rubble that crashed down from largely older brick buildings is overwhelming. Its timing (4.35 a.m. on Saturday 4 September) was the major things that prevented any loss of life. Travelling down the same streets a few days later, on many street corners (most of the damage occurred to corner brick buildings) huge diggers are now razing the buildings to the ground.

The reactions of most people have been uplifting - neighbours checking on each other, getting to know each other, providing food, shelter and any other help needed. In Christchurch there are a lot more people wanting to offer help than those requesting help.

As a consequence of living through this event and continuing to experience many after shocks over two weeks later, many people are now questioning the goals they are living by. We are reflecting on what is really important in our lives, what we are here for and what makes our lives worth living. We often go through life with the same routines and trying to change things at the edges. But this catastrophic event is making people pause to ask, what deep down is really important. People are focusing more on their values – how they want to be and how they want to relate the world around them.

Values are not the same as goals.

A value is more a direction we want to keep moving in – for example, the desire to be a loving and caring individual is a value. Whereas, the desire to start a relationship is a goal. Once you have done it, you can cross it off your list.

We may often set goals for ourselves that do not match with our values.

To get a sense of the gap you may have between what you value and what you are actually doing, try this exercise:

Imagine you are 90 and looking back on your life as it is today. Finish the following sentences:-

• I spent too much time worrying about…

• I spent too little time doing things such as…

• If I could go back in time, what I would do differently is…

To support people in Canterbury I am offering complimentary ‘laser’ coaching (brief 10-15 minute sessions) for people who wish to address their values and goals. I am offering this service until Friday 8th October.

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.

Ron Tustin
Revive and Thrive Coaching

Read Ron's Blog
www.reviveandthrivecoaching.com
info@rtc.org.nz
Ph 0800 003679
 
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Published 28th Sep 2010

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