Way #5 to Kill Conflict – Timing

TIMING: we all know what it's like to be caught at a bad time, so suggesting to carry on the conversation in 2 minutes, 2 hours or 2 days may be the most acceptable thing to do in the situation.

 Read more from Eva-Maria here.

TIMING: we all know what it's like to be caught at a bad time, so suggesting to carry on the conversation in 2 minutes, 2 hours or 2 days may be the most acceptable thing to do in the situation.

How many times have you heard your boss or partner say “Not now, Jack (or insert your own name in here if you’re not called Jack)”. Sometimes the timing just isn’t right for anyone at that point. Simple. In some cases if you have the conversation at this particular time, it may not be productive for anyone, and both people will just get more frustrated, and there won’t be a positive outcome. Or sometimes there may not be an outcome at all!

Whether you postpone for a couple of minutes or seconds, it can make all the difference in the world. I’ve seen teachers in the middle of an argument with a teen, and they just randomly ask to take a second to step away from the conversation and gather their thoughts. It catches the teen off guard (“who the hell literally takes a step away from an argument anyway?!” they’ll think), and it’ll make them think more about their own views, and their role in the conflict as well.
 
If you feel you’re not real to listen, or to be talking about a particular topic, just kindly tell the teen when the best time to discuss it with you would be, name a particular time (and date) and make sure they hold you to it. If they are insulted, or get upset, take the time explain that the reason for the postponement is merely because you want the conversation to be a productive one for you both. The teen will appreciate your honesty, and the fact that you’re genuine about entering this particular discussion, just not right now because you’re valuing your time, as well as theirs.
 
You never know… the whole thing might blow over before the time you set to continue the conversation, so yay you!!

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Eva-Maria <3
em@youshutup.co.nz