Oi OKKA,

Just as well it ain'ta Long-Drop ole horse otherwise ya mite'tov finishe'tup floundarin....tha mind boggles. I'd better bugger off before something slips out, but ya betta slip down ta mitre 10 tamorra an buya safety jacket justn case.

Cheers, Beers, 'n' Nose pegs.

TMI guys !!


Cheers Kai

T.M.I. Ocker. I would sooner picture you doing portraits.

My grizzle for the day, bought a kit set table to assemble, no screws. I had to rummage around my toolbox for some. It would of cost me petrol to go back and get some. How hard can that be to put half a dozen screws in the bag. Kitset came from ozzie

Grizzle No2. The shower curtain keeps blowing into the shower when showering :o very wet and cold on the old bod. Have tried opening the window closing the window putting a towel under the door to stop the draft, put my foot on the plughole. Have now weighted the curtain down with fishing line sinkers using paperclips, helps a little, anyone got any other suggestions?

Yuck that wet shower contact is horrible. Don't remember what I used to do, but I do know it is easier to wash a shower curtain than clean the darned door. Perhaps you could have a little hook either side and a piece of elastic to go across at about knee level.

Thanks Aggie, I had thought of that so will give it a try, yes a curtain is much easier than the glass doors to clean and you can put a different one up for a change in colour. I clean my shower using a kitchen broom, just spray the shower stuff around, leave for 20mins, scrub the broom around and rinse with a warm shower on, easy peasy, no kneeling on the hard floor.

We have just had the bathroom done out as a "Wet Floor" by the DHB and the Disability people although we had to pay a share it was well worth it. The only thing is the specify what you are going to use in the way of fittings etc. One thing the builder arrived with was shower curtains, he told me that if you want extras for washing or replacement you can get them from Mitre 10 Mega.

Rather a protracted lead in but the crux of the story is that it say's in the packet "Waited to stop blow in" and on the bottom hem it has a beading sown in to weight it just enough to hold it down. Only thing is they fairly expensive. These ones are labelled extra long too so make sure you know what length you want first.

Works a treat!

Dear Mr. Key

Please find below our suggestion for fixing NZ's economy.

Instead of giving billions of dollars to banks that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan..

You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:

There are about 200,000 people over the age of 50 in the work force.

Pay them $1 million each severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

1) They MUST retire - The result: 200,000 job openings - unemployment fixed

2) They MUST buy a new car - The result: 200,000 cars ordered - Car Industry fixed

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - The result: Housing Crisis fixed

4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university - The result: Crime rate fixed

5) They MUST buy $100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week ....... and there's your money back in duty/tax etc

6) Instead of stuffing around with the carbon emissions trading scheme that makes us pay for the major polluters, tell the greedy b......s to reduce their pollution emissions by 75% within 5 years or we shut them down.

It can't get any easier than that!

P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of parliament pay back their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances

If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you know. If not, please disregard.

Grumpies of the World Unite

Also, let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home.

This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.
They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of paying it out.
They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.
Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.
A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and snacks to their cell.
They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.
They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counselling, pool and education.
Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be free, on request.
Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard, with gardens.
Each senior could have a PC a TV radio and daily phone calls.
There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.

The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised.
Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week. Live in a tiny room and pay $600.00 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.


Think about this (more points of contention):

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THE NZ CONSTITUTION - They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq .... Why don't we just give them ours?
It was drawn up by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for centuries and we're not using it anymore.

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THE 10 COMMANDMENTS

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse or Parliament, is this -
You cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal', 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians...... It creates a hostile work environment.

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Also think about this .... If you don't want to forward this for fear of offending someone -- YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM!

It is time for us grumpy old folk of NZ to speak up!

Dear duly elected head plonker,

Rather than the above,please consider the following suggestions.

1) Immediately remove all 'perks' from past MPs.

2) Immediately reduce MP's salaries to the same level as minimum wage;when it rises,so will your salaries. I suspect it won't take long...

3) Immediately start building more state houses,thus creating jobs & addressing the shortage.

4) Immediately adopt the Swedish system for child poverty,using money already paid to govt in a slightly different way & put it out of reach of ANY present or future govts.

If you're interested in continuing as PM,this is far more likely to bring you votes than your present course..

Ocker & Belladona, I woke up to these two e-mails this morning from NZ. Holly mackeral news travels fast ah! Do ya think the elected will get it? Nah, I don't think so either!

"Twenty years of broken promises and failures to meet environmental obligations have left New Zealand with little to be proud of, according to a new "wake-up call" report issued on the eve of a global summit.

The World Wildlife Fund report, Beyond Rio, has slated successive governments for failing the environment since promises made at the original Rio Earth Summit in 1992, and says the country now risks some of the highest rates of biodiversity loss on Earth unless urgent action is taken."

Well, that is a slap in the face for Kiwis and a kick in the pants for all the wonderful nature lovers and environmentalists this country keeps patting on the back. What have they been doing, certainly not what has been necessary but rather prettying it up for the tourists to maybe come and spend their money here.

Too many laws and few obeyed or acted upon, maybe. It is all about cost but the chiefs are not losining their big salaries. Sack them all and start again with a minimum wage and a promise of a rise when some action has taken place. With all those darned cows ruling the plains and more and more land being appropriated for the same our environment has not got a prayer

Give the unemployed a chance to get out for some exercise and work to keep them fit. On the minimum wage as well. Oh! Bother. John says he hasn't got any more money, not nothing at all.